Dry nights come later, and you can’t train them

Your child is dry all day, and people start asking when the night nappies are coming off. It’s worth knowing that night-time dryness works differently from daytime training.

Night dryness is development, not effort

The NHS says most children learn to stay dry at night after they’re dry during the day, and that this “happens naturally over time and is not something you need to teach”. Your child can’t learn it by trying harder, and they can’t be motivated into it.

Wet nights are also very common. NICE guidance notes that more than 1 in 5 children still wet the bed at age five. The NHS says bedwetting often runs in families. Among the reasons it gives are a child not sensing a full bladder while asleep, or making more wee at night than their bladder can hold.

What helps

• Plenty to drink during the day. The NHS advises giving your child enough water throughout the day. Don’t cut drinks overall (see our post on drinks).
• Regular toilet trips. The NHS suggests around 4 to 7 a day, including one just before bed.
• Avoiding caffeine, which the NHS says can make children wee more.
• Easy night access. Make sure your child can get to the toilet at night, with a night light or a potty in the room if that helps.
• Waterproof mattress and duvet covers, so a wet night is a quick change rather than a big deal.

What doesn’t help

• Punishment or disappointment. The NHS warns that punishing a child makes bedwetting worse. It isn’t their fault.
• Rewards for dry nights. NICE says rewards should be for things a child can control, such as drinking well or going to the toilet before bed, not for dry nights.
• Lifting. The NHS advises against regularly waking your child at night to take them to the toilet, and ERIC advises against it too.
• Rushing to stop night nappies. There’s no need to stop while you’re still focused on daytime. Once your child is reliably dry in the day, it’s worth trying a few nights without.